This morning,
( Read more... )

We had our practice group Thursday night. I led a role-play in the psychodrama format I've learned from Jack in my men's group. J wanted help with a situation at work with a "crabby" coworker. He knew at the start that his descriptions of the situation were judgments, and he didn't know how even to express an observation without evaluation. (I' ( Read more... )

Saturday was a day-long gathering for NVC trainers, which I enjoyed very much. It was very personal & connecting. Yesterday Holly (nwsailingirl) & I attended a conversation café we'd never been to, here in Lake Forest Park. When we got there, they were having a free-form political discussion/argument. I asked if that was their intention, adding that if so ( Read more... )

In answer to the question "Why do they act that way?" (or "say those things", "believe that", etc), the answer is always the same: "Because of something that they deeply care about, that I also deeply care about." This answer transforms the head question of "why" and the assumption of alienness ("I can't understand such people") into the heart ( Read more... )

Today nwsailingirl & I gave a two-hour introduction to Compassionate Communication at the Senior Center in Bothell. Twelve people attended. We greeted, shared why were were there (what the work means to us) and invited the same sharing. I clarified that I wanted to hear what it is that people deeply care about that brought them there ( Read more... )

Last night was the first meeting of the new practice group I'm leading with Holly. Three people came, all of whom were in the five-week class that Holly & I finished teaching last month. I loved my old NVC group and my 6 1/2 years of men's groups, and I think this meeting was my favorite small group experience ever. We did check-ins and some ( Read more... )

Punishment damages goodwill and self-esteem, and shifts our attention from the intrinsic value of an action to external consequences. - Marshall Rosenberg

I used to think of myself as "Believer", but lately, I find myself being ( Read more... )